A weekend, a peaceful small town, almost impossibly cheap yet delicious meals, bright weather, the sand and salty water, the blue sky, a great group of companion; a beach of our own. What else would you want?
P.S.: She's surely a great photographer. See her shots of this trip here.
I read your blog yesterday. Yes, the old posts you wrote. Very thoughtful and beautiful. They reminded me of those days of twenty-something talks. Premature but somehow brilliant thoughts about life, the culture, the surroundings.. Restless minds questioning every single thing on earth: the causes and consequences.
Funny to look back how we became a friend. We were the opposite of each other, we came from extremely different backgrounds, yet we shared so many similarities. We have relatively same generalizations on things. I will never regret all conversations and discussions we did, and I thank you for all knowledge and motivation. It is your writings that encourage me to keep writing. Also for the good times and (mostly) depressive times.
I saw you when you were disappointed and finally lost your faith. I know how it feels and none of us want to go back to that time. Now that you've found your decision of what you're going to do, go for it. Wash away the sadness, throw away your fear. I've learned that in some way it is okay to not knowing what you will be in life, as long as you like what you're doing now.
I imagine myself sketching lot of things, reading lot of books, writing lot of transcripts, and I have no idea what profession it is. I believe, in your very rich and colorful mind, you have a vision of what you'll be doing in life, without necessarily naming it. I believe, you will be good in your future field.
So long my friend, someday we will meet again with great stories from each of us. Wishing you wonderful adventures, like what you've always dreamed.
New year, new year. I hope it's not too late to deliriously talk about resolution. Well. I'm not about to write down a list of aims or things I wish to be.
Anyway. Resolution is actually a promise to one's self that s/he will do or not do something, or a target -may it be a simple one or a more complex thing, merely for fun or truly as an urgency for its possible consequences- that someone needs to accomplish. By any means, resolution supposed to give hope and motivation to whoever wishing it. The thoughts and energy in pursuing resolutions should be positive. But, after a long way of efforts and when you finally reach your goal, what's next?
My last list of resolution was back in 2004, in high school. Back then, I wrote every single thing I wanted that I thought would make me happy. I did meet most of my wishes, but I never imagined any chain of details following them years later, nor the gruesome uncertainty of the life after it. It was revealed that being happy at one moment is not equal the ultimate happiness of my entire life, although once I thought it would be.
This is what I call a phase of life. It takes time for realization and it costs us frustration. Or else, it may be just (another) twenty-something hesitation without any knowledge on how to cure it.
Ever since, I stopped making resolutions related to my future life or career. I think I'm not ready to face another disappointment. Yes, I am a coward. For now, I only wish for two things this year:  a Yamaha Silent Guitar SLG-100s; and  to drink more beer. And I will need this damn cool wallet for the last thing I mentioned:
If you are in your mid 20s, physically fit but you feel like you're emotionally unstable, mentally distracted, intellectually disrespected, financially insecure although you know you aren't that bad but anyway everything just seems wrong, then you are in your quarter life crisis. And if you think this situation is truly depressing, try mid life crisis.
His name is Pak Samiran, aged early 40s. He is in the army, but doesn't serve as a soldier -you know, the war and weapon things. Instead, he serves as a driver. Not a tank driver as you might imagine: he's just a driver; a driver of someone whose position is way much higher than him. Which means, he drives for his master's wife, children, and also friends of children -now that, includes me. And this was what happened:
Due to my best friend's wedding, I needed to take care of everything entrusted to me, but my friend insisted that I should not drive. So I ended up being a passenger of the committed driver, Pak Samiran. Two days were really enough for me to know general things that matters to him. On his age, he feels embarrassed about his job, which was why he tried his fortune to level up his position in the army, which he failed.
Not that being a driver is a bad thing, but we never really know what's inside someone's mind. He might not be aware that everybody else might be very thankful to have a driver like him. For him, he's just another looser. And he continued to sigh and told me his worries over his life, although he endlessly tried to accept whatever he got. Then he started to compare himself to other people who has succeed (mostly financially) in her/his relatively young age, and told me when he was at my age, he felt the most happiest since he was still single, free, weightless and reckless.
Despite his sadness and anxiety, he reminded me to not only look up, but also look down. You may feel so unfortunate but you have to realize, that hundreds or thousands people aren't luckier than you; they may even be poorer and pitier. So be thankful anyway.
I figured out, he's in a severe mid life crisis. And I foolishly thought being 20something is hard enough.
So, say hi to mid life crisis, I guess, some twenty years later.
I found it amazing how the days guide us to meet certain, specific people; and it becomes more amazing to know that they are the really right persons to help us keep our life going.
We were in the same high school, also the same university, and nobody will understand why we met and became friends only a couple years ago. I can not explain neither why the quality of our friendship feels like home, at least for me. It is like finding an old buddy with whom I grew up together, although we didn't; a friend who won't change and accept me whoever I am, however bad I am. The friend who made me believe that blessings do exist. All these somehow changed my perception on time and life.
And I still have no idea how I ended up working together with your 'real' old friends, the ones that you call 'your inner circle'; the really best friends of yours. I am honored that you trust me for the big things on your big day.
Happy wedding Mbak Wanda and Mas Suryo. Happy starting a new family on a new year. From now on, you are no longer a wandering 'flying kid'. You are grown up. You have soared into the air, sharing goodness to your surroundings, and I do hope they go back to you and your future family.
I have a good feeling about this year. Hopefully.
Have a wonderful life :)
P.S.: this is the scenic view from room 844 you've requested to tag.